Taking a Hiatus

I have heard it said  that in order to make yourself known or to get people interested in your books to keep publishing or writing. Easier said than done.  I know this from experience and that is why I am taking a break.

In 2011, my first book Marge was published by PublishAmerica. I had learned the hard way that it was the wrong path to take. Not only that but because I was new to to the world of publications, I had no idea that my first book was full of mistakes made by me and the publishers. I felt like a failure and my book was forever in the hands of the merciless and greedy publishers. So I set out to rewrite and make better my book and name it A Second Chance at Love. However, this was an expensive process because I hired an editor to work on it and I don't get much money every month.

Another reason I am taking a break it is not stress free. Since I don't know any publisher who would like to publish my books and it seems that agents would like to know what  book or author your book is similar to, I can't answer that question.  My latest manuscript is a Chrsitian Paranormal Romance and frankly, I don't know any Christians who write that kind of genre-- I consider most of what I write unique in its own way anyway. The only other route is Self publishing and from my own experience, it has caused some stress in my life-- getting the format right stinks!  I just as soon have a publisher that is known to do all that.

I have two works (one in progress) that I would like to get published. One is in the process of being edited while the other? Well, let us say that it is just sitting in my computer folder collecting dust. I am waiting to get enough royalties or even a job to pay for another editor.

Since May, I found out I have anemia. I found out why I have been so tired and lack energy on most days and writing is a lot of work. I just don't have enough energy to do my research. I write for pleasure. So that is what I will do when I am bored, but the stories may not get published unless something else turns up. I am short of a miracle. Promoting my book locally takes energy too.

People told me I should not expect professionals to edit for free so I won't. They also tell me not to expect to get a professional cover design for free so I won't. But I will say this: If God provides, I will accept. I will not limit Him in anyway.  If a professional says he or she will help me at no charge, it is not by my hand, but by the favor of God. Those two services I can't afford.

Another thing that has me down is promoting my own books. I can't use certain pictures without someone saying "Hey! That's mine! Pay up or else!" I really don't understand why people share their photos. I guess they all hope to get profit and that is why they share. I would be even glad to give them credit, but if people are greedy for gain, forget it. Why become an author if you have to  Be "careful" of what you use? I am definitely not an artist either.

So there you have it. After Jesus Paid It All  is published and unless a miracle happens, it will be a long break.

Writing is Not Easy

I would like to say that it is a piece of cake to write. I have being doing it for many years and get great story ideas, but over the years I never had anyone  tell me that I need help. My mother and sister knows I have the  gift of story telling  and they encourage me to not give up.  I never dream of becoming an author before I become a teacher, but it has happened and I have had my share struggles and very little success.
I have great friends who bought my book and give me a good review, but I also have friends who will be honest and tell me: You need help.
I am torn between giving up and pressing on. If anyone ever said, that you can make money writing books, they are wrong. Not unless you happen to be a best seller which is my dream. I never wanted to self publish my books.  There have been times when I wanted to throw in the towel.  My friends  writes about how well their books are selling, getting  rewards and all kinds of great things that has happened while I feel like I get pushed in the mud. Don't get me wrong. If I need to improve, I will, but it is not easy.  Did I ever say my books don't need help? Maybe once.
 One of my biggest challenge and obstacles is getting descriptive. I have a an author friend who had  told me countless of times   "add description" or "Show how they feel"  I  try! This is where I want to give up.
Writing is a passion, but teaching is my calling. Write is what I do when I  am waiting to teach. Just a note: I am not sure I would even be a great school teacher because I have been outside of education for too long, but that doesn't mean I will give up on my calling an dream of teaching. I have to believe in myself because God believes in me. The same goes for writing.

Book sales and Book signing

I have high hope for myself and I  believe that my books will sell. I am not delusional. It is my faith. God said in his word that I am the head  and not the tail. So why is it my books not selling? Why can't I get a book signing?
These are  the things I struggle with. I hear about how some of my friends' books are  selling but mine isn't. I am no different. Most of us are Indie Authors. Am I not marketing my book enough?
I believe it is because I am up against  an obstacle-- a spiritual force that does not want my books to sell and he is keeping me from having a book signing. That force is no other than the devil himself. He does not want to see Gods' children  succeed.
 Maybe you think it is hogwash, but it is not. The  Bible says we  do not fight against flesh and blood, so it is  Satan influences people to not be interested in my books and me. He will not win because I am a fighter and I will succeed!  One other note: I have always known that  this town is not for me.  I went to several businesses and was either met with rejection or they never get back to me.

To Rewrite Or Not

When I began  writing Marge it was with pencil and paper. I wrote to escape so when I finished writing Marge, I  wrote another version and I enjoyed  finding  out the different results, but when I write for publication, it is a different story and a whole new ball game. 

I struggle with the issue whether I am good enough. I don't have  what it takes to be a best seller and I want to be!  The first thing I have to do is believe in myself!  I realized that I have been given the ability to tell stories and I have to set up expectations for myself. That is when frustration sets in because I have become self critical.. You know, they say we are our own worst critics?  Someone makes a cake and it doesn't measure up to perfection, you berate yourself and you want to do make another cake. Of course, it is more costly to make another cake. What is costly for me is my time.  What I thought was perfect was a story I am working on.  It is called the Butterfly and the Cocoon.

 

I wished that I never read a certain book. Although it has been helpful, it told me that the use of "to be" verbs should be very minimal and  we should "show" and not "tell"  As an amateur author I struggle with that. I write what comes naturally to me and  someone comes along and says "It won't sell if you write like that."  What do I do? I rewrite. However, it has become a nightmare. Instead of enjoying what I do, I get frustrated and want to quit. No, I don't quit, but I do say "Why bother?" because as I look at what I have written, I am finding it is not good enough.  

It is good to take advice from an experienced author. You want to follow in his steps because you know he sold books, but when you set up that person's  guideline as your standards, you are bound to be frustrated. If God  gives you the ability he will also  give you the words to write if you listen to him. If he says to you to take heart  and not be discouraged, then look up and say to yourself, "I can do it!" Do not compare yourself to  others.  God created you to be you not anyone else. You are unique.